Gender Born, Gender Made. Raising Healthy Gender-Nonconforming Children
Gender Born, Gender Made is a comprehensive guidebook for the parents and therapists of children who do not identify with or behave according to their biological gender. Drawing on the case histories of several children, each “gender creative” in his or her own way, Dr. Diane Ehrensaft offers concrete strategies for understanding and supporting children who experience confusion about their gender identities. She also discusses the latest therapeutic advancements available to gender-variant children. Traditionally, psychologists have sought to “cure” gender variance by pressuring children to conform to typical gender behavior. From her perspective as both clinician and parent of a gender creative child, Dr. Ehrensaft advocates a new approach, encouraging caregivers to support gender-variant children as they explore their gender identities. Rather than offering a “cure” for gender variance, Gender Born, Gender Made facilitates improved understanding and communication about gender identity.
Mom Knows. Reflections on Love, Gay Pride, and Taking Action
Catherine Tuerk. 2012
When my son came out to me, I was deeply fearful that he could never be happy. And I felt profound sorrow, almost as though he had died. Thus began one woman’s extraordinary, silence-breaking journey: Catherine Tuerk set out to educate herself and others about gay people. She became a leader in PFLAG–Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays. She wrote articles for varied publications and appeared on many television and radio shows with the aim of dispelling homophobia and promoting pride-inspired advocacy. On frequent vacation trips abroad, Catherine and her husband served as pro-gay ambassadors, getting to know gay people and their parents in other cultures. Concerned that the unique realities of gay and transgender children are often overlooked or ignored, Catherine was instrumental in establishing a pioneering program that supports and affirms gender-nonconforming children and their families. All along the way, Catherine Tuerk has been writing candidly about her journey. Mom Knows is a lively and compelling selection from her writings of two decades, with this remarkable mother’s distinctive voice frank and insightful, compassionate and hopeful coming through strong and clear.
My Child is Transgender: 10 Tips for Parents of Adult Trans Children
Your adult child has come out to you as transgender and is considering, or has already begun, a transition from male to female or from female to male. What do you do now? This short, accessible guide is aimed at parents of transitioning adult children, offering ten tips to help you navigate one of the most challenging, and ultimately rewarding, times in your life. It is also helpful for other family members and loved ones looking for guidance. From “Lose the Blame” to “Learn to Let Go,” the practical tips offered in My Child is Transgender: 10 Tips for Parents of Adult Trans Children will help you learn to support your child and yourself as you both move forward into new beginnings. Matt Kailey is an award-winning author, blogger, college instructor, and community activist who began his transition from female to male in 1997. Since that time, he has educated thousands of people about transgender and transsexual issues through his presentations, trainings, books, and popular blog and website, Tranifesto.
The Meaning of Matthew. My Son’s Murder in Laramie, and a World Transformed
Judy Shepard. 2009
Today, the name Matthew Shepard is synonymous with gay rights, but before his grisly murder in 1998, Matthew was simply Judy Shepard’s son. For the first time in book form, Judy Shepard speaks about her loss, sharing memories of Matthew, their life as a typical American family, and the pivotal event in the small college town that changed everything. The Meaning of Matthew follows the Shepard family in the days immediately after the crime, when Judy and her husband traveled to see their incapacitated son, kept alive by life support machines; how the Shepards learned of the incredible response from strangers all across America who held candlelit vigils and memorial services for their child; and finally, how they struggled to navigate the legal system as Matthew’s murderers were on trial. Heart-wrenchingly honest, Judy Shepard confides with readers about how she handled the crippling loss of her child, why she became a gay rights activist and the challenges and rewards of raising a gay child in America today. The Meaning of Matthew not only captures the historical significance and complicated civil rights issues surrounding one young man’s life and death, but it also chronicles one ordinary woman’s struggle to cope with the unthinkable.
QUEER: The Ultimate LGBT Guide for Teens
Teen life is hard enough with all of the pressures kids face, but for teens who are LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender), it’s even harder. When do you decide to come out? To whom? Will your friends accept you? And how on earth do you meet people to date?
Raising My Rainbow: Adventures in Raising a Fabulous, Gender Creative Son
Lori Duron. 2013
Raising My Rainbow is Lori Duron’s frank, heartfelt, and brutally funny account of her and her family’s adventures of distress and happiness raising a gender-creative son. Whereas her older son, Chase, is a Lego-loving, sports-playing boy’s boy, her younger son, C.J., would much rather twirl around in a pink sparkly tutu, with a Disney Princess in each hand while singing Lady Gaga’s “Paparazzi.” C.J. is gender variant or gender nonconforming, whichever you prefer. Whatever the term, Lori has a boy who likes girl stuff—really likes girl stuff. He floats on the gender-variation spectrum from super-macho-masculine on the left all the way to super-girly-feminine on the right. He’s not all pink and not all blue. He’s a muddled mess or a rainbow creation. Lori and her family choose to see the rainbow. Written in Lori’s uniquely witty and warm voice and launched by her incredibly popular blog of the same name, Raising My Rainbow is the unforgettable story of her wonderful family as they navigate the often challenging but never dull privilege of raising a slightly effeminate, possibly gay, totally fabulous son.
She’s Not There: A Life in Two Genders
The provocative bestseller She’s Not There is the winning, utterly surprising story of a person changing genders. By turns hilarious and deeply moving, Jennifer Finney Boylan explores the territory that lies between men and women, examines changing friendships, and rejoices in the redeeming power of family. Told in Boylan’s fresh voice, She’s Not There is about a person bearing and finally revealing a complex secret. As James evolves into Jennifer in scenes that are by turns tender, startling, and witty, a marvelously human perspective emerges on issues of love, sex, and the fascinating relationship between our physical and intuitive selves. Now with a new epilogue from the author and an afterword from Deirdre “Grace” Boylan, She’s Not There shines a light on the often confounding process of accepting ourselves.
The Transgender Child: A Handbook for Families and Professionals
Stephanie Brill and Rachel Pepper
This comprehensive first of its kind guidebook explores the unique challenges that thousands of families face every day raising their children in every city and state. Through extensive research and interviews, as well as years of experience working in the field, the authors cover gender variance from birth through college. What do you do when your toddler daughter’s first sentence is that she’s a boy? What will happen when your preschool son insists on wearing a dress to school? Is this ever just a phase? How can you explain this to your neighbors and family? How can parents advocate for their children in elementary schools? What are the current laws on the rights of transgender children? What do doctors specializing in gender variant children recommend? What do the therapists say? What advice do other families who have trans kids have? What about hormone blockers and surgery? What issues should your college-bound trans child be thinking about when selecting a school? How can I best raise my gender variant or transgender child with love and compassion, even when I barely understand the issues ahead of us? And what is gender, anyway? These questions and more are answered in this book offering a deeper understanding of gender variant and transgender children and teens.
Transparent: Love, Family, and Living the T with Transgender Teens
When Cris Beam moved to Los Angeles, she thought she might volunteer just a few hours at a school for gay and transgender kids. Instead, she found herself drawn deeply into the pained and powerful group of transgirls she discovered. Transparent introduces four: Christina, Dominique, Foxxjazell, and Ariel. As they accept Cris into their world, she shows it to us—a dizzying mix of familiar teenage cliques and crushes and far less familiar challenges, such as how to morph your body on a few dollars a day. Funny, heartbreaking, defiant, and sometimes defeated, the girls form a singular community. But they struggle valiantly to resolve the gap between the way they feel inside and the way the world sees them—and who among us can’t identify with that? Beam’s astute reporting, sensitive writing, and passionate engagement with her characters place this book in the ranks of the very best narrative nonfiction.
Transitions of the Heart: Stories of Love, Struggle and Acceptance by Mothers of Transgender and Gender Variant Children
Transitions of the Heart is the first collection to ever invite mothers of transgender and gender variant children of all ages to tell their own stories about their child’s gender transition. Often “transitioning” socially and emotionally alongside their child but rarely given a voice in the experience, mothers hold the key to familial and societal understanding of gender difference. Sharing stories of love, struggle, and acceptance, this collection of mother’s voices, representing a diversity of backgrounds and sexual orientations, affirms the experience of those who have raised and are currently raising transgender and gender variant children between the ages of 5-50. Edited by Rachel Pepper, a gender specialist and co-author of the acclaimed book The Transgender Child, Transitions of the Heart will prove an invaluable resource for parents coming to terms with a child’s gender variance or transition.
Helping Your Transgender Teen: A Guide for Parents
If you are the parent of a transgender teen, this book will help you understand what your child is feeling and experiencing. Irwin Krieger is a clinical social worker with many years of experience helping transgender teens. This book brings you the insights gained from his work with these teenagers and their families.